Tuesday, January 6, 2015

Thoughts on Year Two

In case you missed it, here were my Thoughts on Year One.

Brian and I celebrated 2 years of marriage on November 3, 2014, so I'm only two months and three days late on writing this post.

video

(I made this little video. Six years of non-professional photos.)

Overall, I'd say Year Two was a better year. (If I'm being honest here, Year One was spent in the trenches, so there was really no where to go but up!)

I can't speak for Brian, but I'd say the second year was better as a whole, but the hard moments were harder. Fortunately, most of those hard moments led to personal growth.

Looking back on my first year's blog post, I discussed learning to change my attitude towards the little nuisances. I've tried not sweating the small stuff - the wet towel that's always on the bedroom floor; the empty water bottles that are left sitting on the counter, the coffee table, and the nightstand (grrrr!!!). I think I've done well.

One lesson I learned in Year Two is that I need to make more Love Bank deposits. I read about the Love Bank Concept in the book "His Needs, Her Needs." The idea (albeit cheesy) is that relationships have a Love Bank and everything you do is either depositing or withdrawing from the account. Early on in relationships, partners almost always make deposits. After a while, however, accounts start getting depleted. The slightest thing can become a withdrawal - annoying habits, insulting words, disputes, miscommunication. Basically, once your married, every day is like a massive withdrawal to the bank. You have to keep making deposits in order to balance it out.

I haven't mentioned this Love Bank Concept to Brian yet. If I did, he'd probably just look at me and say "you're withdrawing right now."

Well there you have it. Two years down. Hopefully I'll report back next year with an even better report!


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