Monday, June 1, 2015

Our New Life or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)

On March 22nd, Brian and I got the surprise of our lives when I took a pregnancy test.

(hint, hint - it was positive.)

Long story short, I had gone several weeks without realizing I was pregnant, so one of my first thoughts was "Damn those three margaritas last night that tasted so heavenly delicious."

Oh, and that 18-month, non-refundable gym membership I had just signed up for because I was determined to get into the BEST SHAPE OF MY LIFE?!


When a positive pregnancy test is the last thing you'd ever expect, it's hard to articulate the level of shock that comes with it. Even now - two months later - the whole thing feels very surreal.

At every doctor's appointment, I'm waiting for them to be like "We're just kidding! You're totally not pregnant!" And then maybe a reality TV crew will bust down the door and be like "SURPRISE!!!!!" and I'll just be sitting there like "Wtf, I knew it. My life is the Truman Show."

So, yeah.
That's how I would basically describe where I'm at right now.

If this pregnancy is in fact real - and alas, I'm pretty sure it is - I'd say I feel 99.9% like my normal, non-pregnant self.

The first trimester was a breeze.

While I'm excited for our new adventure, I'll let you in on a little secret - I'm not a baby person. I don't like babies. And neither does Brian. So you can see we're in a bit of a crisis here.

When it comes to taking care of a baby, Brian's all like "you got this, right?"

And I'm like....


I'm clueless when it comes to babies.

For now, I'm choosing to remain ignorant when it comes to...pretty much everything. I haven't read any books. I haven't done any research. My approach is called "Learn As You Go and Adjust As Needed."

Just keep swimming, just keep swimming...

On the day I found out I was pregnant, I took a long walk around the lake trying to process all of my emotions. I remember wanting to pray and ask God for a million things, but all I could manage to say was "Thank you, Lord."

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you one million times over.

Despite all the worry and fear and uncertainty and confusion, I felt a deep sense of gratitude.

On a separate (less sappy) note, I plan to keep the pregnancy blogging to a minimum. It may be miraculous and fascinating for some, but pregnancy is not my favorite topic.

And let's recap - I'm not a baby person.

Last I Googled, there are SEVEN BILLION people in the world and we all got here the same way, so my circumstances aren't exactly unique.

Is our child more important than the other seven billion people on Earth?
Is he or she God's gift to the world?

In a word: Yes.

But I'm not one to brag or anything.

Wasn't I the cutest?! 

2 comments:

  1. I love this! And am so excited for a little strawberry! Good thing one of your besties was at one point called "The Baby Whisperer" and "Super Babysitter" by you! ;)

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    1. E, you are a natural with babies. Remember our days keeping the nursery at church? I don't think I ever once changed a diaper LOL! I prefer the big kids. I'd love to bypass the baby stage. :-)

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