My Biggest Resolution for 2013

I haven't done much goal setting or resolution planning yet this year.

I spent the first day of 2013 spending time with Brian, going to the movies with friends, reading a book on the couch, and cuddling with Otis. It was perfect and it was exactly how I wanted to spend my time. It's the foundation I'm hoping to build on for the next 364 days.

I'm going to spend the rest of this week blogging about my vision for 2013. I haven't exactly mapped out that plan yet, but most of my resolutions involve making myself a priority. I realize that putting my  own needs first may come across as selfish, but in 2012 I really felt like I "let myself go" in many ways.

Most of the changes came about once we got Otis. Otis was my biggest joy, yet he was my biggest challenge. Having Otis as a puppy seemed so much more difficult than when I had Colby as a puppy, but I can't really figure out why it felt that way.

It's painful to admit this, but I often felt tired, moody, and irritable from the moment I woke up until the moment I went to bed. During the first few weeks we had Otis, I felt like Brian was never home and that I was being left alone to do all of the work. Otis would cry and whine at night. Sometimes he would need to pee at 3am and sometimes I would wake up at 4am to the sound of him puking. Brian miraculously managed to sleep through these things 95% of the time. Funny how that works!

It was probably pretty similar to having a newborn baby, only Otis was way cuter than any newborn baby.

My one-hour morning routine suddenly morphed into 30 minutes of feeding and walking Otis, 15 minutes of trying to get ready for work, and 15 minutes of trying to stop Otis from eating insert inedible object here All of this was happening prior to 6:30am and it really set a negative tone for the rest of the day . There were no more relaxing mornings spent drinking coffee and reading the Bible. When I got home in the evenings, there were no longer any long walks at Lake Lynn or trips to the gym.

Looking back, I was overly attached to Otis. I didn't want to do anything if it didn't include him. Since Otis is in the crate while we are at work, I felt guilty if I was away from Otis for even an hour in the evenings.

For 2013, I'm determined to find a better balance.

Now that he's 8 months old, I can already see that it's getting better.

We love you Otis.

You have stolen our hearts while you simultaneously ruined our life. That takes talent.

We wouldn't trade you for the world.