Papa's Pizza

One of my favorite memories came towards the end of last year. December 19th to be exact.

I was driving home, sitting in traffic, and I asked Cam what he wanted for dinner.

"Pizza!" he told me.

Now mind you, we had ordered pizza the previous two nights, but you know toddlers. They always be on some kick.

And you know me.
I be lazy. (see previous post)

So I was on the phone with Papa's Pizza, hoping I wasn't talking to the same dispatcher for the third night in a row ("Maybe there's multiple people with the last name Strawberry" thought no one ever).

Midway through my order, a shrill scream erupted from my backseat.


In all my life, I've never known anybody that wanted to order the pizza.

In fact, my friend Eric Sherwood once spent 30 minutes trying to place a pizza order online, simply to avoid making the call.

But not on this night. No, not on this night.
My three-year-old wanted to order the pizza.

So I finished my order, hung up the phone, and - in case I hadn't heard him the first time - Cam yelled "I WANNA ORDER THE PIZZA!!!!" about sixty more times.

I tried rationalization. I tried logic.
Those both went over well.

Gripping the steering wheel, I was about to explode....but then....

I texted Brian, who was still at work and unaware of the ensuing chaos.

"I'm gonna call you and you be Papa's Pizza."

Brian responded, "k"

(No questions asked, apparently, which is a little strange in hindsight.)

So I pressed the call button, put it on speaker, and handed my phone to Cam in the backseat.

And then the cutest moment ever unfolded:

"Papa's Pizza" said the "dispatcher."
"Hey." said Cam.
"Do you want to order a pizza?"
"Yes, please." said Cam.
"What do you want on it?"
"Cheese." said Cam.
"Do you want it to be small or large?"
"Small, please" said Cam.
"Ok." And then the "dispatcher" hung up.

Cam was so tickled with himself. He had ordered a pizza!

I was so tickled with myself. I had outsmarted a three-year-old!

So that was one of my best memories from 2018.