This Is Your Life When You Have No Life.

Lately, I feel like my life has been pretty lame.

Brian is incredibly busy every night of the week now, which makes me feel insecure about sitting on the couch, drinking wine, and taking pictures of my dog all evening.

As expected, the house hunting is not going well.

Last night, however, I was reminded of how badly I need a house.

Trust me: Apartment/condo/townhouse life is not very fun unless you are in college.

Well, yesterday was a horrible day. I felt sick most of the day, which I think was a side effect of the flu shot. Work was not great. Brian was not home because he is out of town this weekend, so that left me to take care of Otis all by myself. Taking care of Otis drains your energy (unless Otis' energy is also drained, as seen in the photo above). Unfortunately last night, Otis was in hyper-drive. Every few seconds he would bolt past me with a forbidden object in his mouth, such as Brian's work shoes (sorry Brian). Gotta love the puppy stage!

I had to also battle not one, but TWO Godzilla-size roaches in my bathroom. I am deathly afraid of bugs, but I had no choice but to face my fears since Brian wasn't there. I thought my weapon of choice (hairspray) would act like a stun gun, but I was wrong. Those roaches freaked out and came running right at me. I was barefoot and screaming. The whole experience was horrific, but perhaps I can consider it my cardio workout for the day.

So after that episode, I was ready to settle in for the evening. I had already showered and gotten ready for bed (it was approximately 7:30pm, but I want to justify this by pointing out that it gets dark early). That was about the same time Otis decided he needed to go outside to use the bathroom.

There I was in my pajamas, if you can call it that, cursing Otis under my breath. I had on a cute little Victoria Secret thing that basically covers nothing, but I definitely didn't feel like getting fully dressed for this two-second outdoor potty break. So I decided to slip on Brian's sweat pants which were laying nearby. These pants were about two sizes too big for me, so the crotch area was down around my knees. Oh, and they didn't match my little night gown at all.

Let me also mention that I had just used a blow dryer on my hair. Just picture someone who has been electrocuted.

So at this point, I am convinced that I can easily slip outside unnoticed, let Otis do his business, and come straight back inside without ever being seen. Nobody should ever have to see me looking this bad, except Brian. (Brian is forced to love me even at my worst).

So I head downstairs with Otis in tow looking like a train wreck.

Oh, the things we do for our dogs!

Brian and I have a front door that has no windows nearby, and there's no way to see what's waiting for you outside. It's awful. So I took my chances and just swung open the door.

Low and behold, some young, attractive guy was standing about ten feet away from me. I think he was the neighbor's boyfriend, but I really have no clue. He was just standing there. He looked star-struck, or maybe just confusion-struck, and I had absolutely no choice but to continue outside (there was no turning back at that point, because it's not like I could've just shut the door and pretended this wasn't happening). So I confidently walked outside with Otis, let him down to pee, and then walked back inside.

This guy was looking at me like I was from another planet. He never said a word.

I, too, was speechless.

This was a horrible, no good, very bad day.

I just wanted it to be over.

I think I need a vacation.

And a house.


  1. i love you and your freshly hair dryer dried hair...if that makes things any better! :)


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